What the Heck is CARRP and Why Do I Care?

I've been reading Secure by Dr. Amir Levine; it’s a followup to Attached, which got folks thinking a number of years back about the secure/anxious/avoidant attachment model. Fair warning: Levine’s writing style is very self-help-y, right down to the many, many acronyms. The concepts were interesting enough that I was willing to set aside my admitted low tolerance for that particular style and pound through the book. 

This actually does come back around to Customer Success, I promise. :) 

Levine argues in Secure that no matter one’s attachment type, there are five traits that make someone a trustworthy presence in any relationship. Without them, the other person can’t establish their own sense of security, regardless of warmth or good intentions. He refers to these traits as CARRP: 

• Consistent

• Available

• Responsive

• Reliable

• Predictable

They don’t sound incredibly exciting, as confirmed when I enthusiastically tried to tell my partner that he’s CARRP. 🤦‍♀️ After he was done laughing at me suddenly throwing out a random acronym while trying to tell him I think he’s great, he responded: “So… what I should take away from this is that I’m boring?” 🤣

But! The point is, he is exactly himself all the time. Moods and circumstances change, we all have our ups and downs, but he is reliably the same person no matter who he’s with, what the situation, and what level of stressors might be around us. I trust his consistency, I love that he shows up, and I can count on his behavior and decisions to align with who I know him to be. 

When we show up reliably, in the same ways, quickly and consistently, we build a pattern of trustworthiness. (CS practitioners, I see you! Customer relationships run on the same fuel.)

Levine goes on to pair CARRP with what he calls SIMIs, or 'seemingly insignificant minor interactions'. These are the small, everyday behaviors that aren't attached to anything huge or heroic; they're the non-glamorous act of showing up, every single day, in ways that deepen the basis of the relationship. Just like in personal relationships, these can be inadvertently neglected, causing damage to the customer relationship.

Being or becoming CARRP takes practice and intention. I’m having some great conversations with folks about this now in CS Leader Lab. If you want to shore this up in your own professional relationships, book a free consultation.

Photo credit: Amanda Richardson. Taken last week in San Francisco when this delightful crossing signal stopped me in my tracks)